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It has been almost a week since I quit smoking. I'm feeling pretty good overall. I do still have the urge to light up and sometimes the urge almost overwhelms me. So far I have been able to kill the urges with a combination of resolve and support from the few people I have not shut out during this time. I also gain a great amount of support from the people on YouTube who have posted comments and given me positive feedback. It really means a lot during all of this to see response like I have. Thank you all who have taken the time to comment.
You can see the latest video here: Day 5 (I Quit)Labels: Bicycling, Home Depot, Smoking, Video |
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| 9:04 AM | Posted by Dave |
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| Keeping My Mind Occupied.... |
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So I am working on a new podcast, it's about 1/2 finished and will be out as soon as I get some more girls to talk to me... I'm joking... really.
Good stuff!Labels: Bisexual, Girls, Podcasting |
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| 10:10 PM | Posted by Dave |
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I am still having the urge to smoke frequently throughout the day. I have begun fasting and will continue to do so for the next 48 - 60 hours. The fasting will help me to take my mind off the smoking as well as detoxify my system. I need to make sure I am almost constantly drinking water through the fasting process. Filling my stomach with water helps curb the feeling of hunger as well as flushing my system.
I spent the first half of the day cleaning my swamp cooler. I took the whole thing apart and pulled the pads out to clean them. They are made from waxed cardboard and they're full of sediment. They probably should be replaced but I have to order them since no local shop carries these pads. Anyway, I cleaned the whole thing and put it all back together. During that whole process I really only had one minor twang for a smoke.
I will post another video soon, maybe on Day 5 but until then I will keep updating the blog here.
My friend Miiska left a comment on the latest video!! Thanks sweetie :) you are the best!Labels: Addiction, Quitting, Smoking |
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| 1:29 PM | Posted by Dave |
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Probably one of the most difficult things I have ever done in my life. To actually succeed I need to create a situation which will not allow me to fail. Certain conditions have to be met so that I can not backslide even in a moment of weakness.
Here are my conditions:
- No cigarettes
- No money to buy more cigarettes
- No outside contact, no temptation
- After Day 2, no food for the next 48 hours
- No alcohol or soda during the fasting*, only water
These conditions ensure that I can not fail and I will quit smoking. The first 24 hours were the worst and I used alcohol to avoid dealing with the pain of withdrawal. I drank until I got sick, on purpose. It was my full intent to consume alcohol to the point of vomiting. This was keeping my mind and body from letting the nicotine addiction consume me.
In the morning I had somewhat of a hangover but not too bad. The strong desire to smoke was back as well. This day proved to be very difficult, however the trick is to occupy the mind. I did this by allowing my landlady and her dog psychologist friend to talk my ears off. Normally I avoid conversation with her as it is unbearable. This was different and I needed to be distracted even if I didn't care one bit about anything being said or discussed. It worked and I was able to get through the urges and curb them. At one point she lit a cigarette of her own and I had to leave. Interesting side note is that I did not have the urge to smoke when she lit one, rather it made me nauseous.
Lea doesn't like or understand my actions and is quick to tell me so, where Annie is not bothering me at all after I told her not to. She still thinks however that I'm being weird and extreme. Neither of these girls understands what I am dealing with or what it will take for me to succeed.
I still have a long road ahead of me. So far it is working and with perseverance I will succeed shortly.
* Fasting can be dangerous, you should learn the risks involved as well as the proper method for both fasting as well as introducing food into your system again after the fast.Labels: Addiction, Quitting, Smoking |
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| 4:00 AM | Posted by Dave |
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I am having a problem with Blogger and the latest podcast is not posting correctly. here is a direct link to the file which you can use until I get the problem sorted out. I apologize for the inconvenience.
TL40 - Full CircleLabels: Trailer Life |
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| 1:34 AM | Posted by Dave |
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$172 later I have secured my unrestricted driver license! I am extremely happy. The original suspension was supposed to go until October of this year but for some reason it was lifted.
I am actually eligible for my Commercial Driver License which was an even bigger shock. I opted to obtain the Class C today because I was not prepared to take the written Class A test. I took the written test for the Class C and it was a piece of cake, but the Commercial test is a bit tougher when you haven't kept up on the little things that change year to year.
I can go back into the DMV at any point and upgrade it when I am prepared to take the written test. I will also need to get a Medical to put on file as mine has expired.
Things are looking up and moving forward... more to come..Labels: DUI, Trailer Life, Trucking |
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| 9:52 PM | Posted by Dave |
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So I went down the other day to see if I could get my restricted license which I would need until October when my real license was re-issued...
Holy shit.
I am holding a piece of paper in each hand right now. The one in my left hand is the DMV sanction which says quite clearly that my license will be suspended for 2 years. The document in my right hand is something the DMV gave me saying that if I pay roughly $200 dollars I get my "real" license back... now.
Well I am going to pay the money and run with it. I don't really understand what is going on and as I almost started to tell the DMV employee, it should be suspended for another 6 months. But I will go with the flow on this one. I quickly shut my big mouth.
This is a godsend for me, my timing right now demands that I be able to get out there and get work. Doing that with a restricted license would not only be a violation of my probation but difficult at best.
I am in the process of recording TL40 but this changes a few things in regard to what I was going to say. I am quite happy to make those changes.Labels: Trailer Life |
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| 2:25 AM | Posted by Dave |
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Things are changing for me and I have a lot of things to talk about. I have taken time away from podcasting and have drowned myself in video games and seclusion. I have been taking the blue pill. I have done a lot of looking inward, reflecting on my life both past and present. During all of this I have not forgotten the people who I have met along the way. These people are my friends and I have been neglectful in keeping up my end of the friendships. I have been selfish but it has served a purpose for me in allowing me to focus on where I am and where I need to go from here.
I have met new friends during this time as well. All things happen for a reason, this fact is a constant and has proven itself time and again. I will be leaving the Vortex shortly and although I am not sure exactly where I am headed in the short term, I have long term goals and a path forward. October seems to be an important month in my future timeline. I do not believe this to be coincidence.
Shortly before I vanished from the podcasting community I was in the process of creating a video that I would like to release at this time. It was planned to be released some time ago but got shuffled away during my absence. The video is around 1/2 an hour long and honestly I am not sure how to post such a large file in a way that makes it accessible through iTunes. I do not want to put it up on YouTube so I am simply going to provide a link here for direct downloading if anyone is interested.
Originally this video was intended to be a bit longer and contain more than what it does now. However I feel that releasing it as is will be close enough to what the final version would have been to make it entertaining at the very least.
I said I will be leaving the Vortex shortly and that is true. This means that I will not have access to high speed internet for an undetermined length of time. Because of this I will be doing a podcast and releasing it before I leave here. I will be discussing my current situation and my path forward as well as talking about some new friends and touching base with old ones. Things seem to be coming full circle for me at this point and that is the title of the episode I am putting together [TL40 - Full Circle].
Look for this in the next couple of weeks, until then I hope everyone is doing well and if you are interested in the video just use the link below.
http://www.box.net/shared/praygmbkrlLabels: Trailer Life, Video |
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| 12:55 PM | Posted by Dave |
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| Saturday, December 20, 2008 |
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Puzzle tore her leg open the other day. We don't know how she did it - but it was really serious. No blood, but the skin was peeled back exposing her muscle tissue beneath.
These are a few shots of her wound after the vet stitched her up.
Poor thing..Labels: Doberland, Doberman Pinscher, Dogs |
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| 1:17 PM | Posted by Dave |
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